On inner monologues and aggressive self-love…


After a friend of mine once again flippantly referred to herself in negative tone, I got to thinking about the power of our self talk.

We all have an inner monologue. Yet, so often that inner monologue whispers to us that we are not good enough.  When the voice is critical and harsh, the effect can be emotionally crippling.

We are often very free with our compliments for others – showering  them with praise and positivity. Yet, we rarely afford ourselves the same positivity. 

We forget that what we say to others is not nearly as important as what we say to ourselves.

“It’s not what you say out of your mouth that determines your life, it’s what you whisper to yourself that has the most power!”
― Robert T. Kiyosaki

I hear my friends describing themselves in self-deprecating tones all the time. The words that come out of their mouths are only the tiniest snapshot of their inner monologue and I can only imagine the negativity inside of them. I understand because I fight my own inner monologue all the time. 

“You’re not enough. What difference will the make-up make?  Dress however you want – it won’t change your face. Everyone just tolerates you. You’re going to hate that photo….” and on and on it goes, providing an endless, negative, self-deprecating commentary on my life. 

Changing that inner soundtrack is one of life’s challenges. It’s so much more that just pressing a reset button. It’s about forcing yourself to perform a personal act of love every day. It’s aggressive self-love. It’s about seeing yourself through the eyes of the people who love you and believing yourself to be worthy of your room on this earth and the beauty that you add to it just by your presence. 

It’s not easy but nothing that is worthwhile is ever easy. 

for once, you believed in yourself. you believed you were beautiful and so did the rest of the world.